Writing: Moment in Time - Temporary Respite

He sat and watched the world through the double-pained glass, feeling the heat of the vent mix with the chill outside, his thoughts as chilly as the weather. The conversations around him buzzing and echoing in his head, blotting out thought and tease his attention in irritating seductiveness. The voices grating on his nerves as he turned and glanced at the world inside, hidden from the elements. Cold coffee. Hot vent. Tan hat. Checkered jacket. Nothing but impressions skitter across his mind. His brain reaching out, grasping, trying to hold to something, but, like trying to hold grains of sand, they do nothing but slide through his fingers.

He stands, feeling the years press down on his shoulders, giving him a dread sense of mortality which sends his mind deep into a chasm to which he wishes would close and remain gone forever. He wonders what is on the other side, what awaits him as he draws his final breath and leaps into the darkness. He wants to think that there would be a light and a deeper understanding of the universe, but the feeling that there is nothing but the darkness and eternal loneliness beyond the human understanding intrudes into his fantasy. His steps are slow, calculated, as he walks to the door, as if his feet were trying to savor each step he takes. He can feel each step echoing through his body as if it would be the last one he takes. The cold handle of the door in his hand chills his entire body, mixing with the heat in his blood which is drained away as it gives in to the cold.

The sudden rush of cold, cleansing him deep into his soul, washing away the dreams and nightmares indiscriminately. The sun washing over him as he steps through the door, feeling the ground fade from beneath him as he imagines himself crossing the chasm. The sun strikes him and his eyes close with a languid pace, trapping the light inside his body, allowing it to reignite his soul from the cold flame that had grown there. He reaches into his jacket, slides a smoke between his lips and hears the click of a lighter and the momentary heat of a flame until he breathes in slowly. His eyes open and he takes another step, then another, continuing until he passes his destination. He simply walks, beyond where he had gone before and continues, his thoughts finally solidifying with each step he takes from the world he knew. He knows he can't stay away forever, but for this moment, this single moment, he is free from himself.